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Meet the Captain
On any given day, Kathleen can be found sailing, gardening, sewing, inventing new cocktails or making more art. In her impassioned quest for contentment among life's spectrum of loss/grief & happiness/joy, she ultimately questions what it means for us to find satisfaction in life, particular against the backdrop of the "American Dream."
Kathleen's Path to Coaching
Raised by two rocket scientists/aerospace engineers, Kathleen faced enormous pressure for success. While her parents had the best of intentions in mind, as she grew into adulthood, the pressure for perfection and high achievement was debilitating, leaving little room for her to pursue hobbies, travel, and other passions — to create a well-balanced life. She also heard common phrases like "do what you love" and "find your dream job," which she found incongruent with what she was taught was highly successful (like climbing a career ladder). All she wanted to do from a young age was have a job that was not at a desk.
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But the choice was made clear to Kathleen: You can "do what you love" and be happy, but broke... or you can make a decent living and be miserable at a desk.
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After a few jobs that didn't fit, and finding her mental health declining rapidly at many desk jobs, Kathleen made a choice: I'd rather be broke.
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Over the last decade, Kathleen has had a slew of jobs in various industries, mastering the technique of avoiding the desk. Because she has so many hobbies and activities she loves doing, she is able to find many kinds of jobs that she would enjoy, even if they aren’t high paying. She has not climbed a corporate ladder and her resume does not show consistency — she is completely fine with that. Because a “successful career” in the traditional sense is not important to her.
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Identifying her priorities and values (and examining the vast differences compared to her parents’) has been one of Kathleen’s greatest ongoing challenges and most rewarding exercises. While her parents are two of her best friends, her priorities could not be more different than theirs.
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In a common session of discussing the lack of continuity in her career, Kathleen’s father once said to her with great passion, “On my deathbed, I will know I contributed to science.” This was one of the biggest light bulb moments for Kathleen — she did not want to be thinking about her job in her final days on this beautiful planet. Her father has had an astoundingly successful career and that is wonderful for him, but that’s not what she wants out of life.
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This strict upbringing, combined with a near-death experience and the passing of two dear friends, lead to a deep need to prioritize her time on Earth. Thus, at the age of 20, she started doing the work of honing in on which of her priorities were truly heartfelt. After a decade of work, she’s landed on a good list.
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Her current list of Top Five Heartfelt Priorities:
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Relationship to Self (independence, meditation, alone time)
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Mental & Physical health
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Deep Friendships
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Family (maintenance, balancing the relationships with safe boundaries)
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Realigning her material life -- replacing materialism with essentialism (less stuff, simpler life, living off the land, achieving more peace, moving abroad)
The list is fluid, but Career/Work will never make it onto this list and neither will achieving a certain sort of love life.
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One thing Kathleen knows for certain is that life is extremely short. And challenging. And beautiful. And the most amazing thing is that we get to choose how we spend our time on this planet. Whether you believe in a heaven or that we are a speck in this enormous universe, you get to decide what you do with your one wild and precious life. Will you wait for retirement to “be happy” or will you choose to find your contentment now? The choice is yours.
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